One of the hallmark qualities of a great leader is their ability to ask the "right" questions. In your role as an executive leader or business owner, your ability to effectively lead your organization and people formally is rooted in your ability to first provide personal leadership of "self".
While many of your daily self questions are routine, such as “What’s the weather like this morning? “What should I wear today?” or “What do I want for lunch?” At your performance level, the significance of your questions changes dramatically as they will ultimately affect your professional result outcomes… “How can we better serve our customers?” or “What can we do to further engage our employees on a daily basis?”
So, when you take inventory of the 50,000+ thoughts and 30,000 decisions that you make on a daily basis, exactly what kind of questions are you actually asking yourself? More importantly, are you even paying attention to how you are answering yourself? Following are some of the top questions that successful people pose to themselves on a regular basis:
How can I make the world a better place in the time I’m privileged to be here? Consider how you would want others to remember you after you are gone. Even if it’s just one thing, what is the legacy that you want to leave behind to benefit others? What is most important to you? Does the life that you are living reflect those priorities?
Where and how am I wrong? This is one of the most powerful questions that you can ask of yourself or your people. Everyone including you makes mistakes and bad decisions. When people make the shift from defending that they didn’t do anything wrong to forthrightly considering where and how they went wrong -- Everyone will get to the truth much quicker and then begin the process of investing their time and efforts to actually become better and achieve more.
Why am I so tense and serious? Learn to lighten up. Not only will you feel better, it will help the others that are around you. Adults laugh about 15 times a day, however that includes nervous, put-on and sarcastic laughter. Children on the other hand laugh 400+ times a day, because they allow it to be natural. Laughter is infectious… Pass it on… and by the way, it’s a “win-win”.
How much of this stuff do I really need? Devote more time to learning something new every day than acquiring something new every day. How much of your stuff do you really and truly need? How much of it are you actually using on a daily basis? Honestly, you’ve got thoughts, possessions, habits and even people in your life that you would be better off without. Too many meetings, too many nonproductive social media messages, too many TV programs and not enough quality time to think clearly. Decide what has to go and then be courageous enough to follow through with it.
Am I facing my fears? If there is one thing that is going to hold you back it’s fear. This question requires brutal self honesty, as most people want to appear strong and in control. Are you afraid that others might see your vulnerabilities? The greatest fear that people have overall is the fear of public speaking and everyone ultimately fears something. Whether you stuck your foot in your mouth, spilled a glass of wine or embarrassed yourself in some other way… You are not alone. No one is perfect, so get over yourself and in the process understand that you can only go as far as your greatest fear.
What has to change? In all candor, there are probably a number of things that you know that you need to change in your life. The reality however is that you either feel overwhelmed or have attempted to tackle too many things at one time and then threw in the towel. Change is always big, at least in your mind. So treat it like the elephant analogy and eat it one bite at a time. Identify the one thing that absolutely has to change. Now ask yourself the following two questions… What are the consequences that you are already living with as a result of your inaction? What is the “cost” if you don’t change it now?
Learning to ask the “right” questions of yourself and others will re-frame important thought processes while leading to better problem solving and decision making. It is also an important step forward in creating a life, a career and an organization by design.
Copyright © 2013 Developing Forward | Thomas H. Swank, CBC | All Rights Reserved.
